I have been thinking of this end of the year blog…. and thanks to Jonathan’s love of Lightning McQueen (the movie) I have a little perspective tumbling in my head and I will use it to write this note.
There is a part in the movie when McQueen (main character) and Sally (love interest) discuss how the interstate created a by-pass for the town and everyone drives by and misses it. Here is the clip http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTKb97SrqyE Sally makes a statement that got me thinking, “Cars didn’t drive on it to make great time, they drove to have a great time.”
In regards to the family…. it is no shock that the “picture” of family has changed in this country. Divorce rates are reaching an all time high at 50%… that is half…. so that is shocking to me….half of us will be divorced at some point…. and then I think back to “how it was” …NO, I am not going to write a note about women staying home with kids…. or…. what a family is suppose to look like…. this note is more about the hurried pace in which we live… the sense of entitlement that we have…. the thought that one commitment should suddenly translate into a strength and maturity that takes years to build. Remember when people got married and it was a HUGE deal if the got the china they wanted…. you got married and moved into a tiny apartment and had no room, no money, and you were trying to just “make it”? Remember the hard work that had to go into building a future? Today…. it is something we just feel like we should already have… that we somehow deserve it…. that we should be given the chance…. that life was rough on us as children…so money will fix it all. The reality today is that couples marry….go on elaborate honeymoons and move into big houses and drive new cars. There is no way around actually needing to grow and mature… I can put Jonathan in a suit and tie, he may look all grown up, but the reality is that he is 3 and nothing but time will change that.
The same is true in our lives and marriages and family. The very things we think make us “all grown up” do not make us stronger….and statics (in my opinion) prove the opposite. So if you are struggling this year…. try to enjoy it…. it builds character like NOTHING else can…. if you are living the “fast pace” and feeling empty…. slow down a bit.
Our relationships were not designed to “take the interstate” God designed us for the back roads…. it strengthens us, it takes longer to get places…..because it is supposed to take longer….. we are not designed to “hurry up and get there”. I am sure that many couples get married, get cars, houses, have kids, all before 30 and then say….is this all there is? YES…. but you were supposed to enjoy the ride….. this year….. slow down a bit…..have a great time….. look around and be OK with just being with each other…. I will admit that I am only on “the back road” because of Phil…. it is a huge blessing to have married someone who enjoys me…enjoys the ups and downs….and those macaroni and cheese poor days. Our first year of marriage….. we were so poor and in ministry that we had to go to wal-mart and pick out what card we would buy for the other and then we read them in the isle and thought we were pretty clever to do it that way. Our dear friends Carl and Jenny, who had to feel bad for us, took us to the Olive Garden for dinner…. it was hard times, but when I look back and then look at today…. if we’d have not taken that road…. I would have been so ill-prepared to deal with the issues we face with Riley..with every real trial we have now…..and I have the perspective to know that even these trials….although very real…. are not as bad as they could be…. so instead of trying to “hurry up and get somewhere” I just remind myself to enjoy everything, to take it all in and never think that we are supposed to “be” anywhere….life is not about hurrying up to get there… it is about having the best today…while we are on our way.
Happy New Year to all of you!
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